January. Christmas has gone, the credit card bill arrives and it’s still dark on the way to and from work. Nothing could be more miserable than this time of year. So, phone up the credit card company and get your limit extended to barely repayable levels because Stealthvape Tours and Travel wants to whisk you away from all of this.
It’s been a cracking year, we hope you’ve enjoyed it. Obviously we aren’t referring to that thing we all voted on because it seems like nobody’s happy with that. Or the catalogue of much-loved celebrities who’ve been ripped from us. Or the diabolical weather, traffic gridlock, price rises and Britain’s Not Got Talent. Aside from those, and almost everything else, it’s been a cracking year.
How are you feeling? Has the bloated sense that your stomach is set to explode lessened? Have the psychopathic urges to kill everybody entering your home subsided? Do you manage to avoid sending a close relation to the other side of the planet? In short, was it a good Christmas?
Yes, as we said before Xmas, it’s been a cracking year. Unless you were famous in the 60s, 70s or 80s for singing. Or you were famous in the 60s, 70s or 80s for playing in the band. Or starred in a much-loved film. Or were the voice for the nation on Radio 2. Or wrote brilliant books. Or did magic. Or comedy. Or played football like a god. Or punched people well. Or were a Man from UNCLE. Or were Father Jack. Apart from those (and hundreds of other examples), it was a cracking year.
The world opened up to vaping in 2014. Finally, on the back of huge home market growth, vapers took centre stage in news and current affairs. More than that, ‘Vape’ was made word of the year by Oxford Dictionaries. How appropriate is it that in 2016, as vaping faces its greatest challenges in the UK and overseas, the new word of the year is ‘Post-truth’?
Advocates say one thing, anti-vape campaigners say another; one side gets angry and the others up their game as they strive to win the argument. The cycle goes on and nobody seems to be winning. What we need is common ground, a shared experience to bring us all together. So we arranged a sporting event.
It’s that time of year when supermarkets are full of plastic masks and multipacks of sweets. So, come join us. Sit down by the campfire, grab a marshmallow on a stick and listen to our tale – but be warned, it’s very scary. It’s like the new episode of The Walking Dead only without humour and sense of bonhomie.
The greatest global corporations started life as a cluttered desk and a small window to the world. Tesco came into being after T. E. Stockwell sold a case of tea to Mr. Cohen. Businesses grow like families, and all families need planning, financial planning. As part of our quest to become a dominant international brand, we are delighted to announce the launch of the Bank of Stealthvape.
It’s the highlight of every holiday season. It is the thing old age pensioners cling to and young fresh faces joyfully gawk at. Nobody buys it all year round – but come Christmas [formally known as the winter seasonal holiday] newsagents stock up on copies of the Stealthvape TV Radio Times.
Like 2015 before it, and the predictions for 2017, 2016 was another year of 52 weeks. Three hundred and sixty-five days of non-stop searing vape action – but how did it compare to our annual predictions? Good question, let’s find out…
